amazed

yesterday while riding home from work and a post-work week beer with a co-teacher, i got to see what must be one of the top 5 things I have ever witnessed in my life. I was biking along the ATT and was just getting to a bridge that is about a mile from my house and i was looking up towards the darkening sky and saw a shooting star, now i have gone out to the countryside to watch the Perseid meteor showers before and they are nice, but this was truly magnificent. Just stunning. the thing ripped across the sky, burning and sending chunks of smaller bits popping off. the falling star didn't burn for a second or two and then disappear it streaked across the entire sky, amazingly bright and glorious. I was and still am in awe. I wish everyone had seen it. It made me appreciate the beauty of randomness and chance. A lesson I will carry and try to remember for a long time.

holidays

as the holidays approach I realize that I havent been around the states for a a festive season for a long time. I am really lucky with the prospects for this year. I get to spend thanksgiving with my rents and grandmother in South Carolina(i know but one cant have it all) and the best part is i get to help make the turkey dinner. It will be my mother and I just like when I was a kid except this time I will get to have some wine while preparing and not have to sneak off to get intoxicated. I am actually looking forward to the turkey even though I havent been eating meat for the last 5 months. I figured that if I am going to eat one meal with meat it would be one that tastes the same as it did half my life ago when i last had it. I hope it is as good as I remember and not just nostalgia skewing the memories. Then it is to the other holiday. Xmas. And again i am in luck. I get a few days off from school so I will have time to spend Xmas with my favorite company. ME. I get to spend the entire vacation reading and lounging and generally doing whatever I want. Its perfect really. No one to entertain, no one to be entertained by. I couldnt have planned it better. Durham is amazing still, I have a few bars that i frequent, I have met lots of interesting people and I like the commute to work and downtown. 3 miles on a bike trail is ideal. Its getting colder and the mornings there is frost on the grass when I leave, makes me so happy to be on a bike where i can look at it and be awed.

pretty sure

The Wall Street Journal might be one of the worst papers ever. After all today they said this,
"In reality, the First Amendment guarantees the right to freedom of speech--to state one's views without government censorship or the fear thereof. It guarantees no one the right to make "news." Nor does it guarantee the right to engage in unlawful behavior with the purpose of "making views known." - Wall Street Journal

http://online.wsj.com/article/SB10001424052970203611404577044352579113824.html?mod=googlenews_wsj

I think I might have read the first amendment before spouting off about unlawfulness if I were writing for the Wall Street Journal. After a cursory glance at the actual text of the constitution.
Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances.
I think we can all see why this riot gear and pepper spray and rubber bullets are a problem. Those that occupy dont just want one of their rights protected. They want them all. Of course the Wall Street Journal argues that it is fine to say whatever it is OWS is saying, but how dare they assemble without a permit. Permits are not needed its our right as Americans to be here.When did the constitution become a crime? When will it stop?

lesson learned

I have been teaching a unit on West African folk tales. Generally they follow the same rules as other fairy tales, bad guy does something gets caught moral....
So we read one in class where a trickster cheats his way to marry the kings daughter and is found out because he leaves his water bottle at the place where he cheats. It is of course found out and the marriage is annulled and he is punished. Pretty clear message and moral i think. So I ask my students to tell me what is the story trying to teach, most of them got it, honesty, cheaters never prosper, the truth always comes out, but this one girl in my third period class when I ask raises her hand straight away. I call on her and she says," the story is telling us not to leave any evidence." And people wonder why I love teaching. That kid is going to grow up to be something what a way to see the world. Other than that I got my Praxis scores back. I needed a total of 149 to pass. there were 200 possible points. I finished the Multiple choice section in 27 minutes instead of the recommended 90. I wrote pages of answer to the short answer questions. I had gone out the night before and was really not in the best shape for the test. I barely scored a 196. I even know which question i missed. Ah well next time i will do better.

occupy

so without trying too hard I have been really busy. like not enough time in the day sort of busy. I am also a huge procrastinator and am not so much into the whole need for things. So with all of these forces at work I have gotten little done with regards to the house i bought. it is fine. like livable and I have had people over, friends, family, coworkers , randoms, others but it is by no means finished. i can actually list every single item in my house. a friend was talking about how much shit she has and her need to get rid of some crap and i mentioned that i could name everything including the # of pairs of socks that I have. they thought i was joking. I went through each room and listed off the items and they still thought i was joking. who after all has a bedroom with a bed, small nightstand, sheet set, and one pillow? I do. no comforter, no dresser, no mirrors, nothing else. Well long story short this coworker ended up at my home a few weeks later to pick me up to go out to a party and asked to come inside. I was unsure why but ... she comes in and looks around and looks at me and just sort of goes blank. I asked what was the matter and she says,"you werent kidding." and i was not. other than that i have a new bank account. MF bank. seriously mother fucking bank. ok really Mechanics and Farmers bank but still MF bank. How is the world not MFbanking? 1/4 done with this school year. time flies. will try yo keep up the posts a bit more.

help

somebody. So I had a strange experience with a woman in need. I was biking from my house back to the downtown and I was in a bit of a rush as I was trying to meet some friends for a concert and they were holding a spot for me on the lawn and as it was a free concert holding prime spots can be difficult. I was making a sharp turn onto the ATT and a elderly woman in an electric wheelchair was sitting still with her cell phone out. I looked at her and she pleaded "can you help me?" I stopped and asked what she needed. She had run out of power in not just her wheelchair but her cell also. She lived,"just at the corner" and could I ,"push her to her house" I am if nothing else a good person at heart so I locked my bike and pushed her to the corner. When we got there she informed me that now she could ,"see her house." It was another half a mile distant. It was about a thousand degrees out and I was already late but I couldnt just abandon her though there were more people around at that point so I pushed on and after much sweating and lamenting my kind nature i finally arrived at her home. I swear the road to hell is paved with good intentions. I finally got back to my bike and found 3 hoodlums standing around it looking at the lock and cable. I gave them a hard time and biked into town in time to catch the last of the concert but not in time to get a seat. Eventually I met up with the folks I was going to meet and had a beer, so in the end no harm no foul. But really who goes almost a mile away on an electric wheelchair that may or may not make it back and further why didnt she have a charged cellphone. To rely on the kindness of others is a bad policy, I dont know if I would do it again. Then again I would because many people have helped me when I was in a bind and I feel like somehow I can work it off. Its a hard life working off all the good that has happened to me. I should be thankful to be so in debt.

wild

The last few days have seen a bunch of wildlife in and around my home. Three sightings in particular. First, deer. That is correct there were deer near my home. I was biking on the ATT (American Tobacco Trail) and as I sped along I heard a rustling on the right side of the trail. I looked over and a Deer ran across the trail just in front of me, it was amazing until the second deer ran out following the first deer nearly colliding with me on the trail. I braked hard and swerved to miss the second one almost going off the trail, good times. The second animal was a snake in my house. IN my house. I was in the back room with the door open doing some work in and out of the house and when I can in and shut the door there was a snake, beautiful green little guy, about 18 inches long. It slithered out the back and onto the porch I followed and shooed it off the porch and into the yard where it slithered to the trees. I havent seen it since. I am not such a huge fan of snakes but this one didnt get all pissey when it had to go so I didnt mind it. finally a huge ant fight. Ant war really. There was a small hole in the deck which I had taken little notice of until today when I went out back for my coffee. I stepped onto the porch and looked down and it was covered with red ants. They were scurrying and biting each other and generally in a state of agitation. I quickly moved off the porh and into the yard for a better view of the action. Seems that ant team A lives in the yard. Team B in the hole on the porch. I guess team B did or said something to piss of team B because team B was attacking. They were up on the porch going into the hole and carrying out larva, and then returning to the yard. Team A was being slaughtered. Dead ants abound. I watched for a good 30 minutes as the battle raged. I wonder what happens to those captured larva? Are they eaten, raised as members of the victorious team? How did the ants decide that today was the day to fight? Was there planning did they have a meeting? Later when I went out back it was as if nothing had happened. All the bodies have been taken away, the hole on the porch is quite as always and the ants in the yard are again just milling around a few at a time. Just a strange thing to witness. I was going to get some insecticide to put around the porch to kill them but now I feel bad about it. They have a society that executes advanced maneuvers they took captives, they arent there to piss me off they are just there. If they dont come inside I think I will let them stay put. No harm no foul.

As an aside my matress arrived as did the couch and loveseat, and the house is coming along. The ivy has subsided and I have a bicycle. Life is good.

since i rocked and rolled

its been a long time...
lots has happened. I made it back to the US. I saw almost all of my family. I caught a bunch of fish. i ate way too much good food. and i moved. so now i am in my new house in durham. it isnt actually new just new to me. its a good place with friendly neighbors, close to the things i need and seems like it will be ok to be here for a little while. Things were looking real rosy when I was offered a job as a teacher however that went south with some administrative crap. Long story short i am still unemployed. also it is sweltering here in durham. like 100 daily and humid. this wouldnt be so bad but i have no ac right now as the house is old and the ac needs to be replaced. it is an investment so for now a box fan and sweat are all i got. also the back deck had no railing and the home insurance told me i had to get one if i wanted to keep insured so i spent some time building that. there are lots of things to do before i am ready to say i have settles in comfortably. I have no bed, i sleep on the floor. I have mo furniture so i cant sit except on the floor. I do though have an amazing case of poison ivy. it is horrifying. weeping blister on my legs, arms, torso, hands..truly uncomfortable. i took some medicine that should have helped but i just keep getting new spots of fresh ivy every day. the old spots dont heal they just turn bright red and swollen and then new blisters appear. on a plus side i learned how to install floors, bathroom vanity, toilets, and a few other things. I have another doctors appointment on tuesday to see what else can be done. probably nothing. but i will hope for the best. the itching is insane. it is like each separate area is connected to every other area. if i bump one against a door or brush against a wall all of the areas cry out to be scratched. its like they are alive and addicted to it so my whole body is constantly screaming to be itched and it never gets better. Needless to say sleeping is tough, hot, itchy, on the floor. Welcome to my new life. I will try to get pictures up soon. No promises.

excited

I was so excited throughout the night that I didn't sleep. At all. I get into a taxi in 45 minutes to head off. Happy, happy ,joy,joy.

hours

not that i am excited but i have just 7 hours until a cab gets me to take me to the airport. i have packed and I am just waiting for the time to pass. no sleep for me tonight. I am ready to go and cant wait to get out of here. It has been a long hard slog to make it this far. But in just a few short hours I will have completed another of the challenges that i set for myself. I deserve a beer for this one.

pissed

a valuable lesson for the day. seems like every time i try not to learn i do. so this morning one of the guys that lives in the same building as me left for the UK. He got off on time and had no problems. When I got back from lunch the front desk asked where he was. I told them and they freaked out. They said he owed one months rent. Now this guy arrived the day before i did and has paid at the same time as me for the last 7 months. I knew he didn't but i wasn't going to start something as he was gone. Then they told me I also owed a months rent. That was preposterous. I had them print a receipt to show me what was paid and when. They didn't have when I arrived nor the second month but insisted I owed them. I have been keeping my receipts and went and found them. I showed them the receipts and they still insisted that I owed. I had to call one of the administrators from the school who spoke arabic to help. This after I had produced more adequate records then they had. I just cant believe that people are so crap. Instead of looking through old ledgers which had the receipts in them or looking at the computer records and seeing that there was something odd about a month where there was no revenue reported they accused me and this other guy of trying to skip out on the money. After they finally accepted that the receipts I had were proof enough they asked me if they could make a copy in order to have records. So I learned that people suck.(Well I knew that already but it was reinforced) And I learned that keeping receipts is well worth the minute it takes to slip them into a folder. Keep your receipts they could be your ticket out of a shithole.

exit stage right

I received my final exit visa today which means i am actually allowed to leave the country. I have never been in a country where workers are forbidden from leaving without the permission of the employer. It is kind of scary actually. What if they had decided that I hadn't completed my contractual obligations? I would not be allowed out. I am sure that this happens to many of the laborers. They get here and have their passports taken they work 12-14 hours a day and sleep stuffed 10+ to a room earn barely enough to live and when they finally have had enough and try to go home their employer refuses to grant an exit visa. No exit visa, no getting out of the country. But of course slavery doesn't happen anymore. That ended a long time ago. Unless your a domestic worker or a laborer here in the kingdom. Glad to be able to go without much hassle. Looking forward to the long flights full of booze. And the sand and the water at the beach.

travels

so i finally get to go outside of the city of Riyadh. I will be taking a plane to Medina(second holy city of Islam no infidels allowed) then going up to madain saleh. I am really excited about it. From what I have read it is supposed to be remarkable, and as KSA only issues 1000 tourist visas per year it is virtually without tourists. I have also learned that aside from working here or going on the pilgrimage to Mecca(first holy city also off limits to non Muslims) it is almost impossible to get into this country. Not that many people would want to come. I will of course take some pictures and get them up. My flight leaves at 5 in the morning so it is going to be a long one. Coffee and the joy of travel will get me through. Mostly the coffee i think.

party

Went to an embassy function last night and had a bit much too drink, but I showed restraint and did not jump in the pool with the rest of the crew I was with. They were escorted from the premises and banned from all future events. I had a gin and tonic. I think if the bar had been closed I would have jumped, but as the sweet siren song of alcohol was still calling I decided to stay. A good time all around, I am looking forward to getting back to the USA. This is without a doubt the worst country I have ever lived in. There are no redeeming qualities. I shall not be returning no matter how much they offer in salary.

crazy

these people are all nuts. That is a picture today from a shopping center that I was walking around in. The "woman" was sharpied out as she might be too tempting for the masses and could cause the morals of the nation to be severely degraded. If one's faith is so weak that it must be imposed from an authority figure is it really a faith at all?

fail... nah not here

So this is the last week of classes before the final exams, so the pressure is up, but I should say it is without warrant. I have heard that from the people that write the test that the upper management has decreed that there should be no way for the student to miss more than 3 of the 10 grammar questions. So 70% of the questions are basically given. I have included a sample question from the exam for you to try and guess. Now these are students that have been "studying" English for the last 8 months 4 hours every day. I would think that the level would be a bit more elevated than this, but then again it is the oil that talks here.

In cities, people are always ____________ a hurry.

A) on
B) in
C) for
D) at

Now if that doesn't make you sad and realize that all the complaining about failing schools and stupid Americans is sadly misplaced then I dont know what to say. Makes me feel a bit like I have been wasting my time. Is it so much to ask that people be held to high yet achievable standards? Is that too much?

that'll do pig that'll do

= 100. no training no schedules no help. just set a goal and do it. sure my knees are killing me, and sure both inner thighs bled at different points and sure I probably was dehydrated for a good portion of the last two weeks and sure there were lots of other things, but at the end of the day I can do anything. all i need is desire. As they say when life gives you lemons, pelt someone with those motherfuckers.

enjoy the rapture. Personally, I plan on being one of the chosen. I can't wait for all the holy rolling do gooders to be whisked away. then we can have a party.

and 5 more

makes it 94 miles. so I have a short 6 more and I finish. it was again a scorcher out this evening on my run. a balmy 97.

Something I noticed here in KSA, well specifically at the university I work at, one would imagine that in a nation that follows islam(no matter how many qualms I have with the interpretation) a fairly simple thing to do would be to make sure all the necessary accouterments were in place for the following of the religion. One aspect of Islam that is fairly simple is the washing before prayer. Now prayer goes 5 times a day every single day. thus thousands of people at the university must wash hands feet and head 5 times every day. Never mind the absolutely mind boggling amount of water this takes, the university during construction didnt bother to make a large hall where this could take place. So every muslim goes into the bathroom and washes. Fine except they put their feet into the sink. I know it aint the end of the world but c'mon really that is the best solution. There is a mosque in the school they builders knew that prayer would happen there are thousands of students they are all muslim. What in the name of their god were they thinking? It makes me want to scream, and hold it til I get home.

+5

= 89. I am sure of it and my knees feel it. It is hot. There are actually no words to describe it. Luckily tonight there were no cat bombs. Of course it is purely due to the fact that I was on the lookout for them.

maths

so my math is junk. I guess that's why I went with he history. Turns out I failed to count 5 miles in my total. I put em in the title (+5 +4) but then only counted the 4. thus my new total is 84.

Which means I have a scant 16 more miles to go.

Doesn't change the fact that the cats jump out to scare me.

and 5 more

= 79 which if the math has stayed the same as when i was a kid means i have 21 more miles.

today it is only 97 out right now and I just walked back into the house. Ah the desert.

Have i mentioned the exploding trash cans? They really make the run a good time. See there are these bright yellow trash cans that sit all over the side of the streets I run. They are roughly 55 gallon barrel sized. They are there for the residents to take their trash out and being KSA there is one about every 3 houses. It would be ok if tat were the end of the story, however it is not. See these trash cans have no lids, and KSA has few wild dogs, but they do have about a billion wild cats. Every few days when running I will run by one of these cans and out of the rubbish a cat will come flying. Seems I am just quiet enough on foot to not be noticed until I am literally on top of the trash can, thus I surprise the cat and the cat scares the hell out of me. Now it happens and then I am very wary of the next thousand trash cans I run by and sure enough no cats. Then as soon as I let my guard down and forget to be vigilant about the exploding cans out comes a cat like some demented jack-in-the-box, tear assing away dragging a plastic bag behind it. Ah the joys of running in a foreign land.

Another 5

= 74. 26 remain. just one marathon and i would be done with this. Unfortunately I can't run a marathon. Perhaps that will be next.

I also just noticed that I let a perfectly good chance for a crude joke slip by yesterday. How many times do I get to say 69 down,and not go on a bit of a side note. Ah well age is getting to me.

On an unrelated note I had a discussion today with my coworkers and seems I am the only on that would even consider living forever. It started as a hypothetical if you could be guaranteed never to die would you take it, as in never, as in after the humans end, and life ceases, and the sun burns out. I was the only one that saw the positives of it. Everyone got stuck at the next 50 years when their friends and family dies. If we are lucky we get to see that (versus dying first), so why not take the opportunity to go all the way and live it up.

+ 4 (more)

= 69
which means i have a short 31 left then its over. and I have 9 days to run em. that works out to about 3.5 miles every day. or i could run a few 5 mile days and take a day off in the middle somewhere.
it cooled off for this section of the run it is just 99F out right now. good times

+ 5 +4

= 65
35 more. the 5 was from the day before yesterday. I run and ended up with a rash from my legs rubbing together. It now is a pain in the ass to run as every step is a battle. then the four is from this afternoon. It was 106 when i ran it. I am home now getting rehydrated and doing laundry i will go out and do another 4 before I turn in for the evening. Probably head out at 9 or so. The raw spot on my inner thigh hurt like the dickens while I ran today. but being this close to the end I know i can make it if I just power through and keep on.

+ 5

= 61

39 more. this is getting ridiculous. I feel like I am not making much progress.

I ran around a track for this 5 and for some reason, perhaps it was the fact that it was 104 F while i ran the inside of my upper thigh was rubbing while I ran. At 2 miles it felt raw, three it burned then it stopped for like half a mile, but the last mile and a half I was going to cry. When I got home to shower and looked there is a large spot where my flesh has been worn away. So running today and for the next few days will be an interesting new challenge. I cant take the time off to let it heal as I don't really have much time left to get through these last 40 miles. I can still make it but the pain is going to be an all new level of fun.

+ 5

=56

44 more. good lord it is 99F outside right now and I just walked back inside. I haven't been this hot since my biking in Kansas and Missouri. At least on the bike there was a breeze created by the moving. Here in order to run fast enough to make a breeze I would have to sprint and that might just kill me. Hydrating will certainly take a new priority. looks like I will have to get over my aversion to H2O. Good fun still the run. The new music is going well. There are more interesting things happening in music than I thought I would find. Always pleasant to be surprised.

+ 5

= 51

49 more. today it is 97 out and 10 at night. this is getting difficult.

Slow plodding progress tonight. Just over halfway there and while I feel fine physically, the heat is making it less an less fun to run. I am soaked by the time I get about three minutes into my run. I have to wear a shirt even though I really want to run without one. The upside is I am on the downward side of the 100 I set out to do. I can make it but every day from now on will be a mental battle to force myself out into the oven like world.

Also it is mothers day and I would be remiss not to mention that mine is one of the best going.

+ 5

= 46

nearly half way there. 54 more.

Today was a rough one not only is it hot as all get up out there but last night I went out drinking and thus I was sweating out all the good stuff. Also I went out to the desert for the hash this afternoon and it was a long walk in 100+. thus not the best day to go running again. I think today is either day 14 or 15 so I am just about on track I will need to pick up a few miles extra this week just to be sure that I will make it. I love the running and it is giving me tome to listen to lots of new music. Life for the moment is making me smile. Been a long time since it did that.

+ 5

= 41

59 more

today was a warm and sandy one. it is 93 degrees out right now and it is almost 8 at night.

finished the week working. Just 20 more teaching days. This weekend I have a cinco de drinko party at the US embassy. Tequila and corona here I come.

+ 6

= 36

64 more and i feel good.

sand storms happening fairly regularly thus my running schedule has been interrupted. Hopefully it is just a week long event and not a long term situation.

So Osama bin Laden has been reported killed. Of course not a single one of the students or the converted teachers here believe that it is true. I really don't know what to say about it except there are a whole host of people here that hate the US so much that they would prefer that OBL be alive than give the US special forces that risked their lives any credit. Everything that gets said in the media is twisted to prove that OBL is still alive, or at least that he wasn't killed recently by US troops. Here is a typical exchange I overheard. "Did you see that the US has warned that the threat level has been elevated since they announced it? Yeah they (US) must be planning to stage another big attack against themselves to get another war." This would be one thing if I were hanging out in conspiracy cafes but this was said by two British Muslim teachers at my school in the office that i work in. They believe that the CIA was responsible for the Sept. 11th attacks and that OBL is made up by the CIA to give a reason to dislike Muslims. It makes my head hurt. 2 months then good riddance. They can keep their ignorance and I cant wait for the oil to run out.

+ 8

= 30

70 more and 21 days to go.

I would have run yesterday ,but a sandstorm blew in just as I got home. Not one of those little ones either. This thing blotted out the world. I darkened the earth. I could not see the street lights across the street. It was impressive. Needless to say I could not go and run through it. Thus I fell a day behind on my schedule and I have to make up distance if I am going to finish this challenge. So today was 8 miles.

On an unrelated note I found out that the college I work at, which is supposed to be a good school in the middle east, found out that the mid-term exam was leaked for one of the lower English levels. It was actually posted on the student side of the school website. It was for sale in the copy center. It is in my opinion inexcusable. However I am not the administration. They decided that there would be no retake, nor would there be any recourse taken against those that posted/stole/distributed the exam. I can understand why, the kid who first got hold of the exam is apparently a prince. As in actually in line for the throne. As in of the house of Saud. So you know the whole equality and harsh retribution for theft/lawlessness seems not to apply for those that rule. Fair is fair after all and in front of allah we all stand equal. or so i am told.

+5

= 22

78 more and 23 days to go.

almost to may. this year has really flown. it seems like i just arrived here in ksa in some ways other ways it seems like this place has had me long enough to strip my soul bare. i can surely say that i will be glad to get on the plane and fly off into the sunset. 8 weeks more and the contract is over. we shall see what happens after that.

+5 @ 88 F

=17
83 more and 25 days to go.
Yesterday was squash and thus no measured runs. I am still holding up well though today it was windy and I had eaten a big dinner with friends so I was still feeling full but as I must run a few miles everyday or it will build up to unmanageable level i forced myself to run the 5 today.

Another week down and the weekend ahead. will be boring as usual but at least i have somewhere to run.

+5

=12
88 more and I feel fine.

So the school I work at had a systematic cheat on the mid term exams. As in some of the versions for the exam were available to students before the exam day. like three days before. Just funny in my opinion. The level which it affected will probably have to retake the exam, then again I wouldn't be surprised if they just let it slide with a stern word.

+4

=7
93 more to go and a full 28 days to do it. this one should be no problem. i think i will throw in a day of squash every week and not count the runs I do in the desert.I have no realistic idea as to how far those are. Which means i really have 20 days left if i dont take any days off. awe christ that means i need to run at least 5 miles every day.
tomorrow will be a fun one. it is getting hotter every day. today it is 90 F right now outside and I just got back in. it is just after 9 pm it never cools down here.

day 1

just three short miles this afternoon.(5K) I actually have a bit of a cold and wanted to get started as I have taken my vitals. weight is at 189 lbs. or 86 kilos. resting pulse is 72 beats per minute. body feels fine (the usual aches and pains) see how this bit of fun goes.

responsible

I am making you responsible for the life of those three fish that are now down on the right side of this page. they need fed. just put your mouse over the pond and click and they get food. they will follow your cursor around waiting to be fed but please don't tease them. it is not nice. if they die it will be your fault, and I will be depressed.

challenge

two out of three of my challenges were completed last month. I failed at the push up challenge. it is much tougher to do them than I expected. my next month challenge will be to run for 100 miles in the next 30 days. I start tomorrow. I will go for a quick 6 miles to start and see how I feel the following day. probably I should look into a training program but those just end up taking the fun out of it. The one challenge I did not complete was the one where I had a training routine from another source. I will just go at this 100 miles by my own way. Other than that I have put in for my flight back to the US and I am counting the days until I get to stop working. If there was something here that I actually enjoyed I would consider returning, but every aspect of the life here is about half as fun as it could be. Ah well. just a few months more. then i can go back to enjoying life. I will keep the running log up to date. I am fairly sure I can do this.

how

I went to the mall yesterday to pick up a few things that i wanted and as I entered the mall a family came in at the same time, you know father in jeans and a t shirt, children dressed like average kids and mom looking like casper the black ghost. I have wondered about this for awhile and I finally got the answer. As I entered there was a bit of a clusterfuck in the entry and one of the daughters of the family in front of me got turned around. She regained her composure (she was about 5) and walked off following the draped black form that walked away. The only issue was it was not her mom. her mother had gone the other direction with her siblings and father. I watched in amazement as the kid got further and further from her family until it dawned on her that her siblings were not there. she looked around and then ran to her father who was across the mall. Her parents had noticed that she was gone so it wasn't like they were bad parents but it stuck me that this sort of thing must happen all the time here. After all there are no visual clues to go on when every woman is covered in her entirety. I wonder how many children get lost like this, how many husbands walk up to the wrong wife at a supermarket how many miscommunications are caused by this coverage?

darwin

so i get the whole darwin evolution thing. what i have been pondering recently is sex. how does that work. if at first it was all asexual reproduction and then some mutant came along without the capability to reproduce asexually and needed a partner then ...
or if it had both capabilities where did its partner come from and what are the odds of finding them? and what evolutionary benefit is sex. seems like it is easier and better to just clone oneself. Don't get me wrong here, I love sex. It is great fun. If I didn't know better I would say it is divine. I am just having a hard time seeing how needing a partner to continue the species is a benefit. I understand the genetic mixing and improving the stock of a group through breeding, but where does it all start? What is the lowest order of living thing that sexually reproduces? And what is the lowest order that does it for fun? I would research this topic more completely myself but alas all searches for sex are blocked in KSA. An unfortunate fact of life.

on you marks, get set, no.

I realize that there is the old saying about right hands knowing what the left hand is doing, but today the university made it abundantly clear that they have developed this to an entirely new level. There were as always a slew of emails sent out and there was one that had dire warning about turning in some of the grades that the teachers have been holding onto. We have had theses particular grades for more than two months at this point, so presumably they are not actually that important for any real reason.The email said if these grades were not submitted within the next two days there would be some kind of portal opening causing a doomsday scenario ending all life. This is just my paraphrasing of the email but you get the gist. The very next email sent not more than 20 minutes later from another department was about how the website which the teachers use to submit the grades was having work done and thus can not be accessed for a few days. Pure joy. Things like this make me so happy I can barely contain myself. I dont think it could be planned any better. I have actually watched TV shows where the comedic timing was less well developed. I am hoping for the next email to be about how no teachers completed the absolute necessary tasks and how we all have to do some sort of penance.

better

My foot has healed well enough for me to go out and run again. There has been a dust-storm in the city for the last few days and running was made difficult because of this. On a related note the gym where i play squash is being renovated. I think that aside from myself and the other teachers that use it to play I have seen a total of about 10 other people there. Mind you this is the main gym for a university of thousands of students. In any western nation it would be full of students. Here no one goes and yet they throw money into it. I am certainly not complaining as it will benefit me, but it does seem strange that the monetary resources are not utilized in a more generally productive way. The gym will be closed for about 4 days and then partially reopened as parts are finished. Until then I will be out in the dust running from boredom, wasting time and watching the world pass by.

human

I have been thinking lately about what it is that makes us different from animals. I know that in a technical sense we are animals but somehow we are different. I have been trying to place it but it seems that everything we can do other species have also mastered. Tools? Lots of animals use them. Caring for the sick or injured? Again it is done in the wilds. Communication? I have read reports that it is done by a multitude of animals. So what is it that makes me, me? Is it my ability to just ask that question? That seems like a funny trick. If you are able to ponder your nature and place in the scheme of it all than you may not have a place. Whereas if you never question your nature then you are assured to spend your life in harmony and concert with nature. Being able to contemplate this idea moves one further from being part of it. I am not sure what else there is that makes us human, maybe the ability to remember and hate. I know other animals love or at least mate for life and seem dedicated to their companions but I dont know any animal species that hate for beliefs. Cats and dogs may not get along but it isnt because dogs have their own dogma that rubs cats the wrong way. Humans can hate based on beliefs. Sad when I think about it. We are outside the order and are able to hate. Kind of makes you proud to be human.

fool me once

Another week has passed without any major incident here in the Kingdom of Saudi Arabia. I had the opportunity to go to a US Embassy party last night and I actually had a reasonable amount of fun. The party had a theme that was something along the lines of Hollywood. So many people can dressed in costume. There were Audrey Hepburn and Pee-Wee costumes that were really good and I could appreciate the effort that went into them. Then there were others that were shall we say less than stellar. I took it upon myself to guess wrong what every person was wearing if they had a costume on. The Avatar girls I guessed were John Goodman from Monsters Inc. The Guy from True Grit became Brokeback Mountain. The guy in what appeared to be his after gym outfit was Christian Bale from the Fighter. I personally found these hysterical. These people would actually take the time to explain that they were not who I believed. I would agree and then talk about how i really like the part in the movie where the character I had assigned them did something. When they would point out yet again that they were not dressed as that character I would tell them they certainly were. Why else would we be discussing the movie. It was circular and great. I dont know if they ever caught on that I was just kidding or not. I myself went in no costume at all. Just a button down shirt, tie and pants. When the topic inevitably came round to,"and what are you supposed to be?" I would chuckle, smile and say that is a really funny question. It was good to have drinks, conversations, and music. The best part of the evening had to be when I finally got home, putting my head on my pillow and feeling the world spin. I miss that. It is like I am the center of the universe and everything is in orbit around my perception.

hurt

i was playing some sports yesterday and i landed wrong. now I can not put any weight on my foot because my heel is absolutely killing me. It is swollen and bruised. I will wait a few days to see if it gets any better and if not I will seek professional advice. Otherwise it is hobbling and hopping around for the next few days for me.

considered

My work has asked me to express if I am interested in returning for another year her to the Kingdom of Saudi Arabia. I will need to work on a cost benefit analysis before getting back to them. I dont have a job or any other crucial things lined up for the near future so it is a possibility. Aside from that little bit of news I have started another 30 day challenge. I will try to be able to do 100 push-ups nonstop in 30 days time. There are loads of websites that have training programs on them and I should be able to follow one and get into shape. We shall see. The teaching weeks are flying by and these next two weekends will go fast. The teaching is fine except the school continually undercuts all progress that I make with my students. I was not assigned a particularly bright or advanced class. They are the same level and mixed ability as any other class and I have high expectations for them. I have taken the time to organize activities that take into account multiple learning styles and I give extra work to those that need it, but in the end I expect results. My school on the other hand has from the beginning told the teachers that all writing assessments would be academic in nature and relevant to the level and progress we are expected to make in the book. Yesterday we had the second writing assessment. We have been working on time order paragraphs. The writing prompt. What is your favorite day of the week? Who do you spend it with? This is a question that the students could have answered without ever having put foot into my class. I dont know why I am surprised it just grates on me when the institution that is tasked with improving the level of education in the country is the same institution that is hindering it. So I have a few more weeks and a few more assessments. Should be a fun time.

known unknowns

So I awoke this morning and fired up the old commodore 64 and lo and behold there was an email from my work. Mind you this in and of itself is not at all noteworthy, in fact I have just over 500 emails from my work since i started working here a few months ago. The surprising thing about this email is that it informed the workers that there would be no work today. On the one hand yippee no work. On the other what the fuck 2 hours notice is all a university can manage? I think there must be something that the officials know and are planning for and dont want to have crowds. I cant imagine them just being so incompetent that they would have forgotten to tell us about a day off until the morning of. But hey I have nearly 500 other emails that can testify to their incompetence.

raw

i have begun a challenge for myself. I am so bored here in KSA that I have elected to go ahead and try to do something difficult and potentially beneficial for 30 days. My challenge is to eat only raw food. nothing processed and nothing cooked. Thus I will be eating a lot of veggies and fruit and some nuts. I have been doing it for three days so far and I find that the food isn't the problem it is getting excited for the food. Thus I have been eating only one meal per day. I will probably make it to the end but we shall see at day 14 and 27 it is a long way to go. While deciding to do this I mentioned the concept to some of my coworkers and many of them got on board with their own challenges. One guy is running 1 mile the first week 2 the next 3 the following and 4 the final week. Another is going to eat only 500 calories a day and take supplements, another is writing 1000 words per day. And there are a few others that are going on. It is funny though when I have the choice to eat anything I tend to eat lots of veggies anyways and I dont really eat the sweets. However since I began I have walked into the store and found myself eyeballing the donuts with affection, I think it is just because I know that I can not have them that I look at them. It will be an interesting 27 more days. I just need to find a routine and a way to get enough calories into my body. What could you do for 30 days?

new evidence

there seems to be a dearth of information about the possibility of the lizard that is currently pulverizing the coastal areas of japan. I feel like the focus on this has all been wrong. Everyone is worried about the reactors and the possibilities of a meltdown, and while I agree that it would be a terrible situation a far worse one is underway. After all I just read that suddenly many of the areas affected are low on food and water. Do you know what consumes copious amounts of water and food all at once? That's right godzilla does, and I think it is not hard to imagine that after tearing apart huge swaths of the island the beast has eaten. After all the destruction has slowed for the last day and thus we must consider that godzilla was busy doing something. Eating and growing stronger for his next bout of rampage. Probably. Be afraid be very afraid. If I remember my 1950 and 60s monster documentaries correctly there was always a lull in the action after the first sighting and bout of destruction. When the monster returned it tended to be much much worse.

movement

i am watching the news and it seems that godzilla has begun to attack the nuclear facilities in the east of japan. I knew it was only a matter of time before he turned to wrecking that which created him. When will the UN step in and put a stop to this madness. I may have to form a rogue mercenary force to stop this monster. how long can we all sit idly by and wait while it ravages a country? Will we stand up when it crosses into Korea or china? Are we willing to wait and see if it has the stamina to trounce across the silk road(by and by who makes a road out of silk) and into the middle east and Greece? Where will we make our stand? I for one have had enough of this monster. I call on everyone to join my ranks and force this beast back into the watery depths from which it came. Begone foul lizard. Let the good people of japan rebuild their lives. You have caused enough damage. Dont make me get the mechagodzilla out of the storage shed.

nature or

i am not of course saying that these events happened at the same time but it does seem like there is a little too much damage to discount godzilla in all this.

warmth

i know that there is still winter in the world. it is a sad truth that it has left the part of the middle east where I reside. It is pretty consistently getting up into the 90s. which is stupidly hot. though I am told it will get into the 120s before i am released from this purgatory. One of the people that I work with has recently converted to islam. I just cant bring myself to take it seriously as a faith as it is practiced here in the kingdom. Dont get me wrong I have loads of respect for people that read and think and decide for themselves, but when many of the core beliefs of the religion are trounced in the name of state and then the state makes rules based on the portions of the religion it can use to keep itself secure it seems disingenuous at best. Let me give a concrete example. The king. now the king is a good guy from what i can tell, he pays for all schooling, he has established a social safety net for people that get fired, he is generally doing goodish things with the money he gets from the sale of the oil. So what is my problem. Well islam states pretty clearly that there are no hereditary roles. That leaders should be chosen in order to ensure the best and brightest. So how can the country that has both Mecca and Medina also have a king? Right through total disregard for the portions that are inconvenient. The guy actually has himself called the keeper of the two holy sites. In every way possible he insinuates himself into a role as a muslim guard but then he breaks a fairly simple rule for to keep power in the family. I can see the logic in the no hereditary business. Consider if you will the idea that the king knew that when he died his children would have to make it on their own and all the wealth that has been gotten would revert to the people. I think that he would be even more likely to use the money and other resources to truly benefit all the people. After all why hoard when it could serve the interest of all now and will certainly not serve the familial interest in the future. But then again this keeper feels that he knows better than the prophet(pbuh). There are loads of other examples. It makes me think people are all the same. So long as I get mine,fuck you.

off to the

Races.... This weekend I went (weekends happen thursday and friday here) to my very first ever car race. It was, interesting to say the least. I think that being from the US has spoiled me with regards to cars. Outside of the race track there were lots of young men with their cars all tricked out and polished to a shine but sadly even the best they did was a sad imitation of some of the low riders with hydraulics that used to bounce through AZ when I lived out there. I would have thought that having and spending loads of money would have given the Saudis the edge in this single category but alas it is still the homies that are reigning kings of the bouncey cars. There were of course some silly gauche cars that made me happy. And the races themselves were not that exciting. Mostly it was interesting to be in a place where Saudi youth could relax and be themselves outside and not have to worry about the religious police. There was a stage set up with just some music playing and one would have thought it was a full blown concert there were literally hundreds of young men gathered around just to move a little and listen to the music. I can see why places suddenly fall apart. These regimes think that everything is going fine because no one fights and everyone acts happy, then out of the blue there is something to do, I truly think that half the folks in tahir square in egypt and pearl square in bahrian and elsewhere are not there because they yearn for freedom at the polls, or are willing to die for a representative government, but instead are there because it is the only thing happening in town. It shouldnt be termed the jasmine revolution, but the revolution of the bored. I can almost hear the cries coming out the palaces, "let them play halo." Sometimes people just want to dance, dance revolution.

a new me

I am going to try to live a day as if i were an art exhibition. I was shown a random show name generator and decided to live out whatever the name of the show was. I will do this for a day or two and then go and get a new show name. The first exhibition

Parsing Relevance: Daring to Defy Progress


I can do that. If you want in on the action and I of course suggest that everyone should give it a try the website that generates the names is at
http://www.mit.edu/~ruchill/lazycurator.html
give it a try and see what the art exhibit of your life could be.

ok bitches

and here is why i think it is almost always a really bad idea when some nation whinges about getting their antiquities back. from now on i am coming down on the firm side of fuck them. it is always the case of those who have "lost" or had their antiquities "stolen" that they say, no we are stable and have a right to our stuff. Well when the shit hits the fan it isn't the museums at harvard or yale or the london museums that get destroyed. in fact it is exactly the places where those artifacts were sent that get stormed and destroyed. I am looking at egypt and to a lesser extent greece. I am not sure if any of the things that were looted vandalized and destroyed in these last few days of rioting were actually repatriated but if they were then egypt owes every last living soul a personal apology. I cant believe that any institution would willingly give anything of value to a nation that has such a tenuous hold on safety. When the germans started raining rockets into london, the government made sure to move the art housed in the museums into a safe place. The other argument that is used is of course that the artifacts were stolen during war or colonization or some other time that the "true" owners were unable to protect them. Well to that i say again fuck em. It is war. you don't get to the end and say, "that was fun now give me my stuff back." it's war. you lose that's it. ask the Polish their country disappeared. It's just ridiculous.

On an unrelated note i learned today that though westerners say son of a bitch (referring to a female dog) the Saudis will say the same thing but instead refer to the male dog. This society is so strange that even the insults suffer from gender apartheid. made me laugh.

working

I have finished about half the work which I need to do for this term. I have given midterm exams and graded them and all. Now it is just a matter of sitting around for a few weeks waiting for the students to return. The it will be a 6 week half term until midterms and of course after that it is only a few weeks until I finish. Time has certainly been on fast forward since arriving here. I actually had a really productive day, I left the school early and went to set up my bank account. Almost everyone that I have spoken to has had some issues setting these accounts up, from not being able to because of improper papers to getting told that the ATM card would be mailed and never receiving it.Needless to say I was prepared for the worst and allotted plenty of time for this adventure. I waltzed into the bank and took a number. I waited. and Waited. About an hour later my number was called and I went to the desk. I gave over all my paperwork from my employer and waited while the customer service rep filled out form after form. Eventually he got to the part about my cell number. Of which I have none. I told him that I didnt have a cell and he was taken back. Then he told me I must have one to open an account. I asked why? He explained that every time I try to do any online banking or any phone banking the system will need a code that will be sent to the registered phone number. Makes sense. So I asked where the closet place to get a SIM card was and it turned out to be about a block down the road. I had plenty of time and finished what I could with the teller and then walked down to get a SIM. That went off without a hitch and then I walked back to the bank. I took another number and waited. After the first customer got up I was called by name even though there were still about 12 people in front of me. I walked up and the same rep asked if I had a # I handed him the SIM card expecting it to be on the card, but of course it was not. So he was kind enough to put the Sim into his phone and call the teller next to him where the number came up. He entered it into the system and them told me that the ATM producing machine was broken. I figured that after the kindness and all it was ok there was no reason to play press my luck. I told him thanks and asked when I could return to pick it up. He asked if I was in a hurry. I told him not really, after all I had all afternoon to get this done. He then called the womens bank(separate facilities here) and told them my account details, they printed my card, he sent the security guard around the bank to the womens section to get my new card handed it to me and told me to have a nice day. It was in short amazing. So now I have everything I need to get paid. All in one short afternoon. also yesterday there were torrential rains, and there was a hailstorm that passed on the way to work. Fun stuff. The rains were bad enough that the King canceled classes for students today in Riyadh. Teachers still had to go but no students.

believe it

I had an interesting discussion with some of the students in my class. They asked me out of nowhere before the class had started who caused sept 11. I asked what they meant and they said you know the buildings in NYC. I told them I was unsure and that the planes flying into those buildings along with the fire and heat caused them to fall. What a shitstorm that brought on. Each one of my students believes that Sept 11 was an inside job arranged by the jews to start wars in the middle east. The jews want iraq so that they can have a jewish state on either side of the heart of the middle east and thus can crush arabs between the two. The students had loads of "information" to back up their claim. Most of it produced by nut job conspiracy theorists in the US but hey just because it was meant as a indictment of the US military industrial complex doesnt mean it cant be applied to so other equally radical and hateful organizations. Other things I learned that day. Osama bin laden has been dead since the early 90s and this new one is purely made up so the west hates all arabs. There were no jews that died on Sept 11, thus proving their culpability. How this doesnt point a finger at the other countries without a dead citizen I was unclear. Like say denmark, or vanatu. I learned that the plane that everyone saw fly into the second building was empty and military. I learned that there were no bodies or parts of bodies recovered. I learned that the buildings were in fact blown up from inside like any other structure that was being collapsed. All in all a day which I learned more about the way this side of the world is encouraged to view the world than anything else. Remember these students I have are 18-19. Which means they were 8-9 when these events actually happened. nothing like getting them young.
The very next day of course a vulture was arrested in the north of Saudi Arabia because it was wearing a tag that said Tel Aviv University. It was arrested for spying. the tag had a GPS tracker. I had no cameras no mics nothing but a tracker. I asked how the Saudis knew it was a spy and the answer was that it had been trained to avoid danger and people. You know a bird that doesnt want to get caught. Spy. The mind hurts at how hard it must be to live in a world where faith rules.

it was a year

As year10 draws to a close I wanted to take a minute to reflect on the mundane. I personally took as many naps as my schedule would allow. I procrastinated when I could, I kept up appearances and I generally stayed out of trouble. That said I also wanted to leave year10 with a few thoughts and a few things that the year has taught me. first I learned that there is nothing I can not do for one more minute. Nothing is so bad that it is unendurable. I learned that people have an amazing capacity to surprise me almost always in a good way. I learned that what i need and what i want are far apart. My needs are met and exceeded daily whereas my wants I am trying to work on. I also learned that putting things away right away makes my life better. And I learned that few things beat ironing with music up really loud. As for whats ahead I am reminded of a Tom Petty song,"It's time to move on, time to get goin', what lies ahead we have no way of knowin'. It's time to move on." Its funny to me that so many people try to make resolutions for the new year. I cant think of anything that I want to resolve to do. Alas, as the clock ticks ever closer to the moment when the year ends, not a soul is near for me to mark the moment with. I guess a book and a cup of tea will do for this year. after all it is only one minute and I know I can do absolutely anything for for one minute.