return of the king

First and foremost. Happy birthday to my niece, sister and father, in that order. You shall all live long and eventful lives. Second I think I have found a way back into this blog but who knows how long it will last before the nefarious reds get at blocking it. so I will continue to post here and at www.defendbeijing.blog.com as well. The winter holiday is nearly finished for this year. A bit earlier then I was initially led to believe. You see before the end of last term my boss told me that the new term would begin on the 1st of March. I made travel arrangements and thought nothing more of it. One would expect the department head to know when the term begins, I was also told 1st of March by the FAO (Foreign Affairs Officer) who deals with all matters related to foreigners. So I was confident that 1 March was teach again day. I got a call the afternoon before my plane left for Thailand(ahh thailand) and it was the department head informing me that school would begin again on the 22 of february. Right because 9 days is the same thing. What was I supposed to do about my travel plans? What was I to do about flights? Of course I got all manner of excuses (I remember my father used to say that excuses are like assholes: everyone has em and they all stink.) the chinese must have sixty or eighty orifices for defecation because I have never encountered a people so capable of passing the buck. Needless to say I will be having a discussion with the higher ups this week about the "cultural differences" that we have. You see my boss doesnt like that I schedule my free time to maximize my life. Apparently I should be here in the red menace all vacation long so that if something changes it is not a problem. My need to go see the world, my desire to spend time outside of my apartment, my audacity in expecting to be told what the start date for a new semester is. How culturally imperialistic. Anyways it was a grand vacation and I miss it already.

exam

Ok pop quiz.
1.)What do you get if you build a house from chinese sheet rock?
A.)Poisoned
B.)Cheap materials that are poisonous
C.)Crappy materials that are cheap and poisonous
D.)all of the above
It seems that every time any tests are done on any goods brought from china into the US there are problems. I dont care so much that the businesses here are cutting corners and adding lead to toys and chemicals to pet food. What gets me is that the US has such shit enforcement of safety standards. Is the government not charged with labeling the contents of goods sold in the US. I remember there being a tag on the mattress of my bed when I was a child that said "under penalty of law no person shall remove this tag" or some such nonsense. I still use that tag as a bookmark in case you were wondering. What happened guys? The US can waste billions a year fighting drugs, but cant spend 10 minutes with a home chemistry set making sure the materials used to build homes are safe to be around. I have a fantastic idea. Press all your heroin and cocaine into sheet rock slap a made in china sticker on the back and walk that shit on in. I mean really american government you claim to be in the business of protecting americans from harm, well from my perch it seems like you either are not trying very hard or are almost completely incompetent. Either way it makes me sad. We should just let china take over already and then we can sell tainted goods to ourselves and cut out the middleman. If we eliminate the shipping cost I bet we could even make poisonous sheet rock at even cheaper prices than they already do.

T T T oh my

The teachers class that I have to teach here at the school is really quite interesting. Today I started with a topic on the death penalty and asking about why have it so on. The conversation was going well until....there is little room in china for individual thought and less room for a devils advocate. Not that I advocate the devil(I know him hes an ass) but I actually had on of the teachers tell me in a none too subtle way that "most of us here are party members" I informed her that I was aware of that and though they were party members I was still interested in what they thought. The party can tell you many things but can they tell you how to think, I inquired. That didnt go over too well. I may be reading too much into it but, right now I am a bit concerned. If suddenly this blog stops being posted or disappears send help fast. I am just kidding. Dont send help, I can take care of it. Anyways the rest of it was them trying desperately to set up a "the United States is not perfect so blah blah blah" and I find that the best way to stop that nonsense is to tell the that first. Somehow the people I meet have gotten it into their heads that we americans believe that our government is infallible. I tell them straight up some of the things I think were wrong and that those things need changed. It freaks them out because if I can admit the wrongness of my country why cant they? You can see their brains trying to process it. We ended up talking about some more safe topics. But the safe topics are boring. Who really cares about TV? Or the movies? thats shit I dont even do at cocktail parties with people I kind of like . Why have small talk for an hour every week when it is a chance to explore the vast chasm that divides our ability to see the world through each others eyes. Some people will never get it i think. It is a shame though, because I miss out on an opportunity to learn from them. Ah well if they want safe and easy I can do that too.The Ts are T aiwan T ibet And of course T ienanmen not allowed to talk about them.

sorry about that

IP address conflicts. So no net for a few days.

So I chatted with my sister the other day and she was telling me about her new found fun in Muay Thai fighting. What is wrong with her? I dont mean the fighting, I mean she is like 100 years old, she must be because I am old and she is even older. And she takes up the fighting sport for fun, arent people supposed to mellow with age? Shouldnt she be like I dont know bowling or playing tennis? I probably would think different if she were still like 17 but that train left the station 20 years ago. What else happened? I had the first class of teaching the college administration. Thats right bitches I teach the University administrators english. Talk about an odd feeling I have doctors lawyers, deans , department heads, and others in the class. Today I had to give an assessment test to them so I could divide the groups up, we shall see how that goes. I can see a conflict in the future with the classes. When I lived in mexico there was conflict whenever coworkers had to become equals in a classroom, stupid petty things like the fact that a lower level worker could not have better english than a boss. And in an exercise the boss could not be corrected except by the teacher. I can see the same thing happening here. It will at least be interesting to watch the power dynamics play out in the class. I hope of course that it doesnt happen but if it does at least I am prepared.

phone it in

So last night I tried for the first time since being here in china to order food over the phone. So nice to be in a real city again. So I pick up the phone and dial the number that is on the take-out menu and I get a ringing. Oh so exciting I get to order food in chinese over the phone.. ring....ring...ring...ring...hummm, what is taking so long to answer the phone? Ring... ring... ring.. ring... What? What the hell? ring..ring..ring. God damn it. Why oh Why do these things happen to me? I hung up and tried again. Endless ringing. So instead I had a ham sandwich and and some ramen. Not that I mind sandwiches and noodles but I was so excited too order over the phone in chinese. Now I have to get back to the grind and lesson plan a bunch of classes for next week. Sometimes it feels like there is no rest for the wicked.